how to ask questions

Okay, I talk a lot about this on Instagram but I haven't shown you how yet. So let's do this!

In this culture we consider doctors to be Gods. They spent a decade in school becoming a doctor. Then they spend all day diagnosing people and "solving" their problems. So they know everything. Most of the time when we go to the doctor, we are in a vulnerable position. When we are sick, have something embarrassing happen, have a baby, etc. Having a baby and being pregnant is a little different though. This doctor (or midwife) will know you for about nine months. He/she will be there for one of the most life-changing experiences that a woman can go through. So it is like SUPER important that you trust this person to help you through this. Someone that will stand up for you and you can TRUST them.

I want to tell you a story before I give you all the good stuff!

When I was pregnant and going to the midwife, I had multiple red flags and moments where my gut told me that this isn't who I need in my birth space. I should've listened because I totally know that my birth would've been different and better if I had listened. It doesn't matter that I gave birth in a hospital, what matters is that I had someone supporting my birth the way that I want it to feel like.

I want mostly to talk about HOW to talk to your doctor and ask them questions. At your first appointment (or before the third trimester), these should be asked and if you don't like the answers... go to a new doctor or midwife. It is essential that you feel comfortable and safe with this person. It will help you in labor.

Let me introduce you to...

B benefit

R risk

A alternatives

I intuition

N nothing

This is a great acronym to remember to get all the information you need before making any decisions!

Ask

"What are the benefits if I go ahead with your suggestion?"

"What are the risks if I decide NOT to go ahead with your suggestion?"

"Is there an alternative to your suggestion?"

Take a minute and tune into your body to feel what your intuition is telling you, if it feels right, go for it, if not don't!

"What happens if we wait or do nothing?"

If you are uncomfortable asking or being with your doctor/midwife then go somewhere new. They work for you. You have the final say in any decision.